Take a breath…breathe

Take a breath..breathe….I was telling myself this throughout the evening as I began to stress about my homework. No classes have not started yet ( that is next week) but looking at what I have to do…it is stressful! I knew going in to this program that getting a doctoral degree is most definitely not easy…in fact is it one of the hardest (if not the hardest) academic degree to attain. But even though I knew that in my heart…maybe that did not connect to my fibro brain! The one thing that stands out to me tonight is I have to take a breath…and breathe!

The world was not made overnight, a PHD/EDD is not earned overnight, it is a process! Just like a marathon…I will run for about 5 years or so to cross the finish line! But if I get soo caught up in that finish line and not about the steps it will take to get there…I will lose my focus…and I do not want that to happen.

My focus is already blurry thanks to my RA in my eyes, my body is already tired thanks to my Fibro/RA, and my brain is already running on less than what I would want ..again thanks to my RA/Fibro.  So I am already starting this race with a little bit of lag…but the awesome thing that I have…is my faith! My faith in God is strong, I am learning so much through this tough/painful journey! I am being molded and shaped…I am becoming successful!

We had an EXCELLENT sermon on Sunday morning (I love my pastor’s preaching!), he challenged us to become the leaders that our God would want us to be. Three things he mentioned that we MUST have (a) the ability to stay in God’s will (knowledge), (b) perseverance, and (c) faith. Again those seem so easy…but goodness no they are not…especially when you are like me and your body hurts, your toes hurt, gosh your brain hurts. Everything hurts…and relief…is so minimal. It is so hard to focus on the good when we are so often in such pain!

So I’m going to take a breath…breathe and settle down for the evening!  🙂

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