Freedom

Do you ever find yourself feeling free by sharing your story. I had that experience this week….I finally opened up and shared my story so that I could be honest with several close friends. Why had I not shared before? Well I was scared of being viewed as incapable…scared of being judged…scared that they would treat me as less of a person. Then I realized…I could not be true to myself if I wasn’t true to others. The reality is if people want to treat me different ….oh well…because I am different .

My normal is not their normal…I face many daily battles that so many people do not see. As I am sure you understand, some mornings just getting out of bed is a major battle. Much less getting up, working full time, and completing my coursework. The good news is so far I think my limited discussion has been met with basic understanding. My goal is to as long as possible keep going strong…because that is what I want to do. 

That said, I have realized that I have to balance things too! I have to make my health a priority (similar to what I shared this week with a friend). I will be no good if I push myself soooo hard now to finish….what will happen if when I’m done…..I’m so burnt out I cannot get a job?? What good will that be? 

Overall, I realized I have to have faith in my future. I have to have faith that all will work out! I have faith that being true to myself, making my health a priority, and all of the above is totally worth it.  When we have these sorts of battles….we struggle with decisions….decisions to hide, decisions to not cry and put on a brave face, and decisions to live our lives and not look back with the what if’s. So freedom is worth it…even if that freedom is stopping, re-evaluating, and putting your health as a priority! 

2 thoughts on “Freedom

  1. Wishing you all the best dear. I guess we all go through similar struggles . People in your life tend to forget that you cannot just stand up and go away for the weekend but must make plans to prepare yourself before you venture out the door. Sometimes I want to share but I get scared of sharing too much information and been labelled because of my struggles .

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